Reconciling some old thoughts.......
I wrote a blog post a few months back entitled, "My heart in His hands" Below is the post:
I will be the first to admit that I have always been foolish in the heart. In the past, the desires of my heart have led me astray. My passions have chased the heart of Man and not the heart of God. Yet, the amazing truth and power that I now recognize is that God needed to break my heart into pieces in order to draw me to Him. He took away the world's version of love in order to include me into the greatest love story to ever unfold.
When my heart was broken, wounded and in agony, I received a heavenly visual. I was sitting at a coffee shop in Mexico writing out the bitterness in my heart. As I closed my eyes, He was standing before me with His hands reached out. Without words, He spoke to my heart saying, "do you trust me?" If you do, place your broken, wounded and darkened heart in my hands." I did. I remember saying, "...And don't you give it back to me until it is healed, strong, and bright" He promised.
To give Jesus everything does not mean what I choose to give Him. It is not a compromise. Everything means everything. Everything means my mind, my heart, my family, my hopes, my dreams, my pains, my joys.... everything is His. He is in control of everything. I trust Him with everything. Therefore, I walk in peace and assurance. This is faith at its best.
I look forward to the day when I close my eyes and revisit Jesus as He stands before me with my heart in His hands. This time, He will give my heart back as He had promised- healed, strong and bright. Yet, even when my heart dwells brightly within me, I will continue to passionately seek and chase after the heart of Christ - the lover of my soul for a love eternal.
"Do you trust me?" He said.
I sure do. I trust you with my whole heart.
Much has happened since that post...... The journey of my heart has brought me to a place of new love. I have discovered and have been lavished by a love unimaginable. The pursuit of God's heart and Man's heart are no longer separate. You see, I have come to understand that I only pursue God's heart- and it is only THERE that I will also find the heart of the Man I love. This ensures that both our hearts walk side by side only towards His direction.
The Lord gave my heart back to me as He promised- healed, strong and bright. He blessed me with this. We remember that we are blessed to be a blessing, so this blessing can not stop here. I am drowning in the joy of this blessing, but I also understand that I now have a responsibility to it. The true obedience to this blessing, is ultimately an act of giving glory back to God- where the blessing came from. Everything goes back to Him. A blessing truly magnified which captures its true fullness is when it:
1. Blesses us
2. Used to Bless others
3. Blessing is returned to God in the form of praise for His ultimate glory.
So, now that God has been faithful in His promise to me, what is my obligation? My obligation is the responsibility of my Man's heart. Just as Christ held my heart in His hands- healing it. Making it stronger. Protecting it. And making it bright. I now must do the same with my Man's heart that He has entrusted me with. This is my responsibility and obedience to the blessing He faithfully bestowed upon me.
Just as Christ held my heart in His hands as if it were His own..... I now carry my Man's heart in my hands..... as if it is my own. This is my demonstration of obedience and praise to my faithful God - returning the blessing back to Him for His splendid glory.
